Online Premarital Counseling
Are you feeling anxious about taking your relationship to another level?
Are you feeling insecure and unstable about the changes in your relationship and life?
Are you afraid you and your partner(s) are incompatible because you are too different
Are you avoiding difficult conversations while secretly brewing resentment?
Or perhaps you have noticed that you and your partner(s) disagree on important issues. What's worse, you don't know how to deal with them.
Is premarital counseling for you?
You and your partner(s) are deepening your relationship.
You are taking on more challenges in life together.
You are expanding while connected.
Examples: moving in together, buying a property together, family planning, collaborating on a business venture, financial planning, opening up your relationship...
Disagreements, arguments, and fights have become more frequent.
One or both of you want to retreat, withdraw, and avoid intense conversations.
You are desperately hoping that they can join your team.
You may start to have a tiny little bit of doubt about your next steps and your compatibility.
You miss the golden old days when you are in sync.
You can save thousands of dollars spent on marital counseling by investing in weatherproofing your relationship…
Why is premarital counseling a worthy investment in your relationship?
According to relationship and marriage expert Dr. John Gottman, couples wait an average of six years of being unhappy before getting help.
Oftentimes, when couples come to me for marital counseling/couples therapy, they are in crisis and very stuck.
The longer they are stuck in the dysfunctional cycle, couples have more practice unhealthy interaction behaviors. It's harder for positive change to occur, thus, couples therapy may last longer.
In contrast, premarital counseling by nature is short-term therapy.
The goals of premarital counseling are to help couples develop a strong foundation for their marriage, increase their understanding of each other, and improve their ability to communicate and work through problems effectively.
Graduates of premarital counseling start fresh by practicing healthy communication and positive interaction for a lifetime.
What do we talk about in premarital counseling sessions?
ChatGPT summarizes it as various topics related to marriage, such as communication, conflict resolution, expectations, finances, and intimacy.
I want to expand it to any topic the couple wants to explore, and it does not have to be related to marriage. Some examples are: having children, having pets, house chores, division of labor, roles in the household, and balancing multiple relationships and roles.
A Couple's Therapist's advice for Premarital Couples- Always Come Back to Your SELF.
My answer is: You are ok if you work the following 6 areas:
1. Have a bodily practice.
2. Learn at least one way to self-regulate.
3. Build resources for other regulations.
4. Practice co-regulation with your partner.
5. Develop and continue to strengthen your capacity to identify, explore, and verbalize your emotional state, thoughts, needs, and desires.
6. Be aware of your PARTS and befriend them, notice their interaction with your partner's PARTS.